Women can squirt AND ejaculate Here’s how to tell the difference. Science
SOMETIMES, A SMALL change of body positions can make a big difference during sex. The right position can turn an average round of play into an immensely satisfying bone sesh—and that’s true for trying to make your partner squirt. You’ll want to use your fingers or a toy for stimulation, says Gigi Engle, A.C.S., a certified sex educator and lead intimacy expert at 3Fun. Do you want your partner to squirt for their sake how to make a women squirt, since you want them to have the most pleasurable sexual experience possible? If it’s the latter, then you and your partner shouldn’t attempt squirting.
You should always contact your doctor or other qualified healthcare professional before starting, changing, or stopping any kind of health treatment. If you’d like to learn more about orgasms, check out our in-depth interview with Shelby Devlin, MA. If your partner is using a condom then you’ll definitely want to use some lube to prevent friction, but just make sure it’s not an oil-based lube, as that can damage the condom. German gynecologist Ernst Gräfenberg first described the orgasm-producing area (now known as the G-spot) in the 1950s, although he didn’t coin the term.
You get to hang out in that sweet spot of arousal for way longer, which means more time to enjoy every single moment before that epic finish. No more awkward, quick sessions—just more time to give your partner what she wants, connect, and enjoy the whole ride. With this technique, you’re not just delaying orgasm—you’re making it more explosive. The longer you stay on the edge, the stronger the finish.
The direct stimulation of a wand vibrator on your clit can feel amazing. But if it seems like overkill to you, Tanner also suggests zhuzhing one of your labia over your clit and trying the vibrator there, or just using it over your underwear. (Remember layering?) This way, you’re diffusing the pressure a bit. Tanner suggests imagining the shape of an eight with the center being the nub, and then running a finger along this path.
If you’re feeling tense or anxious, it can be difficult to let go and allow your body to experience pleasure. Stop “trying” to squirt and just enjoy yourself, whether you do or don’t squirt. Once you’ve located the G-spot, experiment with different types of stimulation, such as rubbing, tapping, or pressing. Most women report a “come here” motion with the fingers feeling the best.
Sexual experiences are subjective and varied; what matters most is the comfort and satisfaction of all parties involved. This is normal; it’s the Skene’s glands filling up. Encourage her to let go and ride the wave of sensation. It often accompanies an intense level of arousal and can occur with – or separate from – an orgasm. The fear of a partner’s negative reaction—whether it be surprise, disgust, or disbelief—can further intensify feelings of shame and embarrassment. Don’t let anyone shame you for not being able to squirt, and even more importantly, don’t shame someone for not squirting.
Some people can squirt or ejaculate before or after an orgasm. Squirting can also happen at the same time as an orgasm. Some people also have multiple spurts of squirting spread over a few minutes. A recent study has shown that there is a difference between squirting, female ejaculation, and incontinence during sex. However, the term squirting is used to describe all three in everyday language.